Silent Treatment: The Worst Treatment We Should Stop

The proverb "Silence is gold" teaches people to prioritize listening over talking. However, many people misuse it. In the midst of a conflict, they choose silence. They stop talking, avoid eye contact, give minimal responses, and withdraw from the interaction.

They use silence as a weapon to control those who conflict with them. They want to gain control over others by not saying what needs to be said.

This action is called "silent treatment," a situation where someone decides to refuse any kind of verbal communication (even interaction) as a form of punishment to those who are in conflict with them.

Whether they do it consciously or unconsciously, they want to manipulate that person's feelings.

The silent treatment becomes emotional abuse over time. The person receiving the silent treatment feels threatened in terms of their needs for self-worth, control, and significance.

The person who remains silent, on the other hand, is silently communicating various emotions such as sadness, frustration, anger, bitterness, and disappointment. As a result, the other party is befuddled, unhappy, and lonely.

This condition typically lasts a long time, sometimes days, months, or even years. However, if one party apologizes, even if they are not at fault, the situation will improve. If the situation continues, it can have an impact on one's mental health.

Unfortunately, the silent treatment commonly occurs between people with close relationships, such as family members, partners, friends, or coworkers.

Why choose silent treatment?

Here are some of the reasons why people choose the silent treatment:

• Conflict avoidance
  They choose silence because they are uncomfortable and unsafe expressing their emotions.

• Inadequate communication abilities
  They don't know what to say but want the other person to know they are upset.

• Punishment
  The purpose of remaining silent is to punish and control the person with whom you are in conflict. Silence is used to punish, control, or dominate others. This is emotional abuse.

• Make others uncomfortable
• Avoiding responsibility

Regardless of the negative effects of silent treatment, we must learn how to communicate effectively. Healthy communication can improve relationships.

Dealing with silent treatment

1. Set healthy boundaries

Setting boundaries in a relationship is critical. It teaches you when to back down during a conflict. You can also be open about how their actions or words have hurt your feelings. If you're at fault, please apologize. But if you're not, don't apologize for it.

2. Structure your conversations

Structured conversations are one method of communicating effectively. This implies altering the communication pattern. Take command of the conversation if you are hurt and are not at fault.

Encourage them to speak up and express what has hurt you. This is the time to express your feelings and request an explanation.

Don't imitate what they're doing. Keep in mind that silence is never a solution. Approach them gently and calmly. Take deep breaths, relax your mind, and speak in private. Make sure they're at ease.

They may not speak at first, but you must make them speak without forcing them. Your attempts to communicate with them will eventually break the silence.

Effective communication skills are always beneficial. Every day, strive to improve your communication skills. Your goal is to establish a positive relationship.

3. Manage your emotions

The silent treatment can be harmful to your mental and emotional health. Take care of yourself emotionally in this situation. You can do things like read a book, journal, or talk to a friend about something other than the problem you're dealing with.

4. Express your emotions

Perhaps your situation is related to someone else's. Don't think of it as your problem. Consider whether there is anyone else out there who is experiencing similar difficulties.

Tell them how the silent treatment is making you feel frustrated and alone. You don't need that in a relationship.

Explain that you cannot solve problems in this manner. Then, define the issue. If this type of behavior is a dealbreaker for you in a relationship, be upfront about it.

5. Keep your cool

Don't be emotional. Calmness allows you to communicate more clearly. This also avoids exacerbating the situation.

When facing silent treatment, avoid doing the following:

• responding with anger;
• begging or pleading;
• apologizing just to end it when you did nothing wrong;
• constantly talking about your problems;
• threatening to end the relationship.

Don't blame yourself if you experience silent treatment in a relationship. The silence is not your fault. If the other person is unwilling to change, think about your options. It could be either fixing the situation or ending the relationship.

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